Member, MFS Movie Database
My name is Ryan and I do the best to look like I'm working throughout the
day in Columbus, Ohio. After work I do my best to find whatever sport is the most likely
to do me serious physical harm. Oh yeah, and I love hockey.
When it comes to movies I am of the opinion that Hollywood is dead. The only entertainment value I find in most movies anymore is in how insulting they are and the general commentary they make about the public which finds entertainment in them. This is a town that will occasionally stumble onto a hit entirely by accident "American Pie" and then create a sequel "American Pie 2" which is 100% completely and entirely the same movie and be applauded for the creativity and originality it took to contrive this brilliance. This is a town that has come up with these 4 rules which cannot be broken and completely ruin virtually every film made.
Rule 1: If a film is a suspense film, it must end in a fight scene in which the bad guy despite being a regular person shows a superhuman ability to continue to not only live but fight on.
Rule 2: If a film is a drama, it must end in a courtroom scene. I will turn off or leave any film that ends in a courtroom without hearing the verdict on general principle alone. I mean come on, Patch Adams ending in a courtroom? Give it up.
Rule 3: If a film is an action movie, it will end with first a false bad ending that includes an explosion, followed by a good ending that makes the false bad ending seem not so bad.
Rule 4: If a film is a romance, well I don't know how any of them end because I don't really pay attention, but they damn well better end up with my dates clothes in a pile in the corner of my bedroom